Romantic relationships are beautiful, and who doesn’t want to feel loved, but these relationships are no cakewalk. Relationships require a huge amount of investment in terms of time, money, and efforts. More of all, it is an investment of your emotional energy. That’s why, after you are too invested into someone, it gets hard to let go of them even though your modern relationship is far from ideal. This happens because you don’t want to be with someone else but only this person as your judgement clouds with intense emotions, or maybe you are afraid of being lonely, or you think that you haven’t tried enough to work out your relationship problems and you still have that one last ray of hope.
There always comes a time in sinking relationships where no salvaging can help it. Sometimes the attachment to the other person is so strong that despite various redflags and wrongdoings, two people still want to stay in their unhealthy complicated relationship by blinding themselves from the truth. They think that with time their relationship problems may fade, but investing more time doesn’t mean success. It is important to know when to let go and cut your losses for the sake of your mental and spiritual health, and wellbeing. The following are the reasons enough for you to let the person go and move on.
1. You are Not a Priority Anymore
“ The grass is greener where you water it.”
Do you feel like you are treated by your loved one like you are ordinary? You no longer have that special place in your partner’s life. Your partner prioritizes their friends, hobbies, work and everything else, including other women, over you. Your partner is not available for you as often they used to before. Clearly, they no longer see you as a priority. Moreover, if you are feeling lonely because of your partner’s unavailability, it’s time to let go.
2. Your Partner Stops Making Efforts
“Someone’s effort is a reflection of their interest in you”
Every modern relationship requires continuous efforts from both partners to learn each other’s evolving personalities and to do things together to share new experiences. When your partner is unable to understand your perspective and is not putting forth any work to straighten things out between you two, it’s a clear sign that the problem lies more with this person than the situation itself. If you are turning to other people for some important discussions, suggestions, and for a family emergency, then it’s a clear sign that there is a lack of needed support from your partner and you should rethink about staying in such a relationship.
3. You are Not Appreciated
“Staying in a situation where you are unappreciated is not called loyalty, it’s called breaking your own heart.”
Is it like you always go beyond and make sacrifices for your loved one, and overextend yourself to meet their needs, but still left unappreciated for all the work you are putting in? A healthy relationship is all about give & take, otherwise it seems to be one-sided, where you feel ignored and unvalued. Eventually, you will emotionally drain yourself and not get anything in return.
4. You are Disrespected
“Respect and loyalty are not upgrades in a relationship, they are a requirement.”
Respect is the most essential element in any relationship. The way someone treats you tells a lot about their personality and how they feel for you. Of course, if they love and admire you, they will not treat you disrespectfully. Disrespect can be seen in many forms, such as insults, lying, hitting, bullying, and cheating. Let your partner know when you feel disrespected, if they don’t mend their behaviour, you know where you stand in this relationship, and it’s time to move out.
5. You Find Hard to Trust Him
“You cannot have a relationship with someone you can’t trust.”
Trust is the cornerstone of every successful modern relationship, and if it is getting increasingly difficult for you to trust your partner about their whereabouts, their doings, their words, etc., it is time for you to let him/her go. As a popular saying goes ‘a relationship without trust is like a car without gas, you can stay in it all you want, but it won’t go anywhere.’
6. Past Seems More Beautiful than the Present
“Stop pressing rewind on the things that need to be deleted from your life.”
Do you keep living in the past by remembering all those beautiful memories from ‘once upon a time’. If you are loving those moments more than your present scenario with your partner, and you feel anxious about how the time will be in future between you two, then it clearly signifies there is nothing much left in your relationship. It’s time to stop looking in the rearview mirror as it won’t change your path ahead. It’s time to stop waiting for your partner to change, and move on.
7. Actions don’t Match Words
“Don’t let someone’s words blind you from their behaviour.”
Are you completely baffled when your partner’s words don’t match their actions. For example, when your partner says something, promises to do something or even makes a plan, but fails to do so, they definitely lack in action. If these things have become an everyday affair for you, it means that your partner neither values their own words nor you as a person. These partners resort to lying in order to conceal their shortcomings and flaws. Obviously it’s not possible to keep a healthy relationship with such a person.
8. You Feel Suffocated
“One must love in such a way that the person you love, feels free.”
Well, the goodness of the relationship is long gone, and you start to feel emotionally suffocated with this person for whatever reasons, but you still hope that these reasons will eventually fade away over time. It is important that you let your partner know that how their actions, behaviour, and expectations are restricting you to wear your authentic personality. Even though if they do nothing about it and still keep checks on you, get jealous with every friend or person you are close to, keep a control on who you meet and how you look, judge you on your looks and decisions you make, it is indeed very suffocating and time to get some fresh air by moving out of this emotionally toxic relationship.
9. Your Friends don’t Support your Relationship
“True friends and family are those who can see the truth and pain in you even when you are fooling everyone else.”
This is a clear-cut shot to know that it is time to cut your losses and move on. Our friends and family are the ones who have been with us for the longest time and know us inside and out. These trusted loves one only wish good for us and can detect danger for us with their unclouded judgement. So, pay attention to how your family and real friends feel about your relationship. And if you are thinking of leaving behind your friends and family for how they don’t support your modern relationship, it’s a huge sign you end this relationship before it isolates you from all your loved ones.
Ending a complicated relationship can be devastating, but lingering on is detrimental for your self-esteem, dignity and mental wellbeing. It is wise to accept the fact that your not so modern relationship has reached a dead end and there is no point in watering a dead flower. Acceptance of loss and moving on is the best thing you can do to protect yourself from any further damage. Indulge yourself in things you love the most, it is just a matter of time to regain your mental peace and calm. When you are truly happy from within again and aligned within your inner self, you will attract more goodness into your life, which makes you ready for the right person to fall in love with.